Yoga, surfing, beaches, not eating, buddhism chat: beginning to think I HAVE CHANGED!
6am Don’t make it up for meditation. Again. Too tired. Surely an extra hour in bed is more spiritual than sitting uncomfortably and fidgeting on the floor?
7:45am Excellent yoga class. Feel stretched and ready for surfing later.
9am Can’t drink the smoothie. Feel bad but makes me heave. Manage to pass it off to the creator.
9:30am Workflow meeting. I have to pick up the trash, make a video, hand out flyers and clean up after dinner. No biggy.
9:45am Weigh myself. Lost half a stone. Can’t believe it. Well, I can, because I’ve only eaten vegetables for 5 days. What I can’t believe is that I’ve managed to do it, haven’t cheated and haven’t even craved anything else.
10am Fellow Sanctuary member smuggles me some cashews because I didn’t have breakfast. Top secret. Taste delish.
1:30pm Lunch. More sprouts, not Brussels, some other equally inedible yet good for you treat. Houmous, definitely doesn’t taste like Tescos with spicy Doritos dipped in. Salad, again. Rice, not the eggy fried spicy type, some plain cold stuff. Oh yeah, and cold carrot and coconut soup, what’s the deal?
3pm I am a surfer! Manage to surf on the first go. My time at the Surf House in San Pancho paid off! Feel well proud of myself. Would treat myself to a fruit smoothie from the surf shack – but I’m not even hungry!
5pm Sit on the beach and watch the sunset. And the beautiful surfer people. Feel happy and love life. Surf instructor asks if I want a beer, no, I say. No. It came out quite easily. Five days sober and feeling good.
6pm Back just in time to miss meditation. I’m really missing having time to myself here. And having to be somewhere at particular times. Craving the freedom, but I know it’s good for me here.
7:30pm Dinner, but I don’t eat much. Leftovers again and I can’t face the smell of the veg, so stick to salad.
8pm Have a group chat about what Buddhism really is. Find it absolutely fascinating and love hearing my new friends’ ‘journeys of spirituality’. Sounds like they’ve been through a lot. Buddhism is all about detachment so they tell me. Aim is to detach yourself from everything so you alleviate your suffering. One girl has managed to detach herself from her parents. Find it quite sad. I’d rather be attached and deal with any sadness as and when. Never knew that was what Buddhism is. Not for me.
9:30pm Bed time with a lot to think about.
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